Great Rumbler
There's bad box art and then there's BAD box art. This is a thread about the BAD box art and the companies that commited the atrocities.
All the box art I got came from here. (www.kidfenris.com/features.html)
Tagin' Dragon:
http://kidfenris.com/tagindcover.jpg
There’s no need to explain why this cover is so utterly freakish and disturbing, but things are wrong aside from the eerily grinning dragon sticking a limp maroon . . . tail . . . in his jaws. Why can we see through the skin of the reddish dragon? And just what the hell is going on the bottom right-hand corner of the picture? Perhaps the last question is best left a mystery, since finding an answer would require someone to stare at the cover of Tagin’ Dragon for more than a few seconds. That’s not a good idea.
Some may wonder how art like this could end up on a game for the 8-bit Nintendo Entertainment System, given the big N’s notoriously uptight policies of the era. While the company may have missed the implied sex scene ten minutes into Golgo 13 or the exploding head of Hitler during Bionic Commando’s finale, there’s no way that something like Tagin’ Dragon could have made it past Nintendo. So how did it get to the market?
The lack of a “Nintendo Seal of Quality” on the box of Tagin’ Dragon provides the answer. This game didn’t have to meet any scrupulous Nintendo standards, since it was an unlicensed title published in America by Bunch Games, which was reportedly affiliated with Color Dreams, itself a source of many amusing NES releases that never carried Nintendo’s approval.Tagin’ Dragon was actually programmed by another unapproved company known as Sachen, a fascinatingly strange Taiwanese entity better known for NES games like Jovial Race and that inadvertent monument to game-borne sadism, Little Red Hood.
What sort of game did Sachen create with Tagin’ Dragon? Is it really as repulsize as its box illustration implies? The answer, fortunately, is no, although the title screen could possibly frighten small children who haven’t already been inured to horrendous dragon artwork by the cover. When Tagin' Dragon is started, a lumpy, marginally reptilian creature appears next to the title and starts changing colors. It's hard to watch.
Stider:
http://kidfenris.com/stridercover.jpg
No, it’s not truly horrendous. It’s just cheesy. Strider Hiryu, one of the most stylish of Capcom’s early characters, has been recast as a square-jawed, tights-wearing stock superhero using a sword from She-Ra: Princess of Power to fend off a robot and two monkey-men. In the background we see a lazy recreation of the Russian minarets from Strider’s first stage, though the artist’s overwhelming use of tan makes the structure look more like an enormous sand castle.
The overall effect is not unlike that given by some cheap illustration from a terrible direct-to-video sci-fi film of the 1980s. (The Non-Hiryu guy even looks a little like Reb Brown, star of Space Mutiny.) With that in mind, we might speculate that Sega may have once planned to use this box art for a different game.
http://kidfenris.com/striderredux.jpg
Valis 3:
Original Japanese box art:
http://kidfenris.com/valis3turbocover.jpg
The three heroines of Valis III are pictured above on the cover of the game's PC Engine CD (the TurboGrafx/TurboDuo in the west) release. While the blue border is confusing and the art merely adequate, the cast at least looks as they do in the game. The sorceress at the rear is Valna, the whip-wielding beast-girl in the foreground is Cham, and the blue-haired lass in the armored bikini is Yuko. Remember what Yuko looks like, as she’s the focus of the game's American cover.
http://kidfenris.com/valis3amcover.jpg
I think this is supposed to be Yuko, anyway. However, not only does this illustration bear little resemblance to Yuko’s design, it's not even clear if this is actually supposed to be a woman. The excessive shading around the character’s face makes it seem as though she’s growing stubble, and the oddly elongated arms and large hands lend the figure an androgynous look. “Her” expression isn’t comforting either. Some game covers are blatantly disturbing, badly drawn, or unrelated in tone, but this one is just creepy in an indefinite way.
It’s a shame that unsettling art have turned a few customers away from the TurboGrafx/TurboDuo CD version of Valis III. With Turbo Technologies Inc. squandering ad money on Johnny Turbo and the system getting far less magazine space than the Genesis, SNES, or even the NES, Turbo titles needed good packaging to drive those impulsive in-store purchases. Sadly, TurboGrafx cover illustrations had never exhibited high standards before, and the ball was dropped yet again with Valis III.
On the Sega Genesis, however, a port of Valis III found success in America both critically and commercially, aided perhaps by a cover that wasn’t quite as ugly. (Or perhaps by appearing on a system that was genuinely popular, but that's open to debate.) Still, Yuko couldn’t catch a break here either. Check out the “Yuko SMASH!!” look on her swollen face.
http://kidfenris.com/valis3gencover.jpg
Enjoy!
All the box art I got came from here. (www.kidfenris.com/features.html)
Tagin' Dragon:
http://kidfenris.com/tagindcover.jpg
There’s no need to explain why this cover is so utterly freakish and disturbing, but things are wrong aside from the eerily grinning dragon sticking a limp maroon . . . tail . . . in his jaws. Why can we see through the skin of the reddish dragon? And just what the hell is going on the bottom right-hand corner of the picture? Perhaps the last question is best left a mystery, since finding an answer would require someone to stare at the cover of Tagin’ Dragon for more than a few seconds. That’s not a good idea.
Some may wonder how art like this could end up on a game for the 8-bit Nintendo Entertainment System, given the big N’s notoriously uptight policies of the era. While the company may have missed the implied sex scene ten minutes into Golgo 13 or the exploding head of Hitler during Bionic Commando’s finale, there’s no way that something like Tagin’ Dragon could have made it past Nintendo. So how did it get to the market?
The lack of a “Nintendo Seal of Quality” on the box of Tagin’ Dragon provides the answer. This game didn’t have to meet any scrupulous Nintendo standards, since it was an unlicensed title published in America by Bunch Games, which was reportedly affiliated with Color Dreams, itself a source of many amusing NES releases that never carried Nintendo’s approval.Tagin’ Dragon was actually programmed by another unapproved company known as Sachen, a fascinatingly strange Taiwanese entity better known for NES games like Jovial Race and that inadvertent monument to game-borne sadism, Little Red Hood.
What sort of game did Sachen create with Tagin’ Dragon? Is it really as repulsize as its box illustration implies? The answer, fortunately, is no, although the title screen could possibly frighten small children who haven’t already been inured to horrendous dragon artwork by the cover. When Tagin' Dragon is started, a lumpy, marginally reptilian creature appears next to the title and starts changing colors. It's hard to watch.
Stider:
http://kidfenris.com/stridercover.jpg
No, it’s not truly horrendous. It’s just cheesy. Strider Hiryu, one of the most stylish of Capcom’s early characters, has been recast as a square-jawed, tights-wearing stock superhero using a sword from She-Ra: Princess of Power to fend off a robot and two monkey-men. In the background we see a lazy recreation of the Russian minarets from Strider’s first stage, though the artist’s overwhelming use of tan makes the structure look more like an enormous sand castle.
The overall effect is not unlike that given by some cheap illustration from a terrible direct-to-video sci-fi film of the 1980s. (The Non-Hiryu guy even looks a little like Reb Brown, star of Space Mutiny.) With that in mind, we might speculate that Sega may have once planned to use this box art for a different game.
http://kidfenris.com/striderredux.jpg
Valis 3:
Original Japanese box art:
http://kidfenris.com/valis3turbocover.jpg
The three heroines of Valis III are pictured above on the cover of the game's PC Engine CD (the TurboGrafx/TurboDuo in the west) release. While the blue border is confusing and the art merely adequate, the cast at least looks as they do in the game. The sorceress at the rear is Valna, the whip-wielding beast-girl in the foreground is Cham, and the blue-haired lass in the armored bikini is Yuko. Remember what Yuko looks like, as she’s the focus of the game's American cover.
http://kidfenris.com/valis3amcover.jpg
I think this is supposed to be Yuko, anyway. However, not only does this illustration bear little resemblance to Yuko’s design, it's not even clear if this is actually supposed to be a woman. The excessive shading around the character’s face makes it seem as though she’s growing stubble, and the oddly elongated arms and large hands lend the figure an androgynous look. “Her” expression isn’t comforting either. Some game covers are blatantly disturbing, badly drawn, or unrelated in tone, but this one is just creepy in an indefinite way.
It’s a shame that unsettling art have turned a few customers away from the TurboGrafx/TurboDuo CD version of Valis III. With Turbo Technologies Inc. squandering ad money on Johnny Turbo and the system getting far less magazine space than the Genesis, SNES, or even the NES, Turbo titles needed good packaging to drive those impulsive in-store purchases. Sadly, TurboGrafx cover illustrations had never exhibited high standards before, and the ball was dropped yet again with Valis III.
On the Sega Genesis, however, a port of Valis III found success in America both critically and commercially, aided perhaps by a cover that wasn’t quite as ugly. (Or perhaps by appearing on a system that was genuinely popular, but that's open to debate.) Still, Yuko couldn’t catch a break here either. Check out the “Yuko SMASH!!” look on her swollen face.
http://kidfenris.com/valis3gencover.jpg
Enjoy!