View Thread : Top Story: Slow news day

Dark Jaguar
I'm watching the local news, who knows why, and their top story is a "for the people" piece about a crosswalk with no crossing guard near a local school. Honestly, has it been reduced to this? A minor "problem" that countless schools have?

So, I made this thread. This thread is a CELEBRATION of the mediocrity of local news! Post your favorite utterly pointless news story from your local area here!

Great Rumbler
"Preschool teacher arrested for cooking meth."

It may not be pointless, but I felt like posting it since it actually happened at my school.

Or how about this:

"Watching television linked to ADD in children."

That's absurd! I watched tv all the time as a kid and I don't...have...Ooh! Shinies!!

You're complaining that everything is peaceful there, DJ?

Dark Jaguar
I'm complaining about how utterly pointless the news gets, and how negative it STILL thinks it has to be despite when things are "good enough", which they aren't. Peaceful is one way to say it, but honestly it's all repressed rage against pretty much everything.

There's a difference between "peaceful" and "desperate obscure uselessness".

Besides, everyone here jokes about how pointless the news stories are. Simpsons also makes fun of it.

alien space marine
Were I used too live , Someone missing cat was actually conciderd news.

Fish-market sting results in 14 arrests (

Laser Link
I remember seeing a headline in the Durango Herald (a town of about 7K) about a skunk with a yogurt container (the big 24oz yogurt size) stuck on its head terrorizing down town!

Dark Jaguar
Haha, and I thought Tulsa had it bad! The question is, was it intended purely and only for comedy, or were there those that actually read it thinking it was a major event?

Darn, the subject said TOP story, not Toy Story. I was hoping it'd be about the movie... I liked that movie. :)

Rat shit, Bat shit!


sixty-nine assholes - tied in a knot!